my mind, my thoughts, my life

Just a quick post about things that have been in my dream lately…

{clockwise from top left: ceramic bathroom shelf from used tea cups by Laura Pregger, flat tree hanger, leather dog by Jonathan Adler, trash bin, notNeutral seasonal lantern medium or small, giraffe desk lamp by Jonathan Adler, Mr. & Mrs. Muse shaker by Jonathan Adler, vase from used tea cups by Laura Pregger}

{clockwise from top left: DIY tea cups light {so going to make one of these! soon}, full length mirror with baroque frame, birdcage as pendant, circular reading nook {double as afternoon getaway}, outdoor dining area with birdcage as pendant}

{clockwise from top left: shoes, shoes, shoes, shoes, shoes… crap!}

well, that’s about it…

happy pola{d}roid!

i found this link today via otis&frank, and suddenly fell in love! go check poladroid.net, download the application, and enjoy the FUN!

it’s a BETA product… but who cares?

don’t we all love polaroids? the old, muted and somehow magical colors they show. my dad used to have one, it’s gone now {and i miss the camera even more…} but i remember the fun of shaking those films in anticipation, wanting to know what picture revealed. now, they stopped producing films {or so i heard}, sad isn’t it?

well, don’t be!

we got poladroid here!

quite similar rite?

it’s easy-very easy! just drag and drop your image to the application, and wait. wait and the results will slowly appear, just like the real polaroids! and the funniest part; you could shake the film too make the process a bit faster, juuust a bit… ^^

the results are random, so try again and again to get the most preferrable ones.

oh! and again, you could only process 10 images at once {just as much as films inside the cartidge}, but simply qiut the program and relaunch it again.

so, read the rest on the website… and start to do some poladroids!!

{i am a hater rite now… of valentine’s day and all its pinky pinky heart-y attributes}

but! I think I could just be a nice person and share my thoughts about what to give on valentine’s day… okay… what do we have as options out there? box of chocolate, flowers arrangement, cakes, cards, or simply ‘i love u’s… today, i feel like talking about flowers {girls, cheers!!}

how many guys out there thinking of giving his lady some flowers this val? well, most of them… ‘what flowers?’ is the next question. so? what’s your choice? rose? {red, white, pink, yellow… any colors} lily? orchid?

the confusion of what-kind-of-flower-should-i-give usually ends up with a bouquet of roses… {nothing’s wrong with it… believe me…} just imagine… like thousands of guys bringing thousands of their lovers thousands of roses… {that’s a LOT of roses!} so, why not trying something a little different this year? again… i’m not saying that rose is out of date or what… it’s just a little too common. and it’s okay to go with common, but why not go with something extra special, something that’s only you and your lover’s… something that will leave extra mark for the day… remember this… When choosing a flower as a gift, consider how special the flower is to your lover and what message it communicates.

okay, without any further due… here’s the list of some flowers {i think…} might be a great choice for gift… {i think… again it’s just an opinion}

1. sun flower

sun flower?? {raised eye brow} i know… this is not a common flower… and it’s not even in the right color… yellow? it’s like the opposites of pink.

i love the boldness of sun flower. it’s like a statement. bright and happy… and big. of course this is not an easy choice… but i think it’s nice to see some happy colors instead of pink {and purple} during valentine’s day

2. carnation

carnation usually describes a fascination and divine love… but different colours go with different extra meanings. let’s say, pink carnation is more of an unconditional love, like a mother’s love or something like ‘i’ll never forget you’; while white carnation describes purity, faithfulness and inocence.

but the main reason i pick carnation is not because of those meanings… it’s a bonus. i love the layers inside carnation… it’s complicated yet remain subtle. a pure beauty!

3. lotus

this one is more of personal pick. i LOVE lotus {or water lily}, i just don’t know why… but the look of lotus is unique, and it’s easy to find through out Jakarta… Lotus grows on swamp, but it grows beautiful and strong. I wish all ladies out there remember this always… no matter where u came from, u could always bloom beautifully and grow strong!

4. ranunculus

the name Ranunculus is Late Latin for “little frog” from rana “frog”. this probably refers to many species being found near water, like frogs. most species in this family are poisonous when indigested. so be careful! they’re for your eyes only! no matter how pretty they look…

{the flower arrangement image was taken from design*sponge}

i’m not sure if there’s any ranunculus in jakarta… but i love how natural they look, so soft, loose and casual…

5. anemone

anemone is actually a ranunculus… but this one has a simpler petal… they are mostly herbaceous perennials with bright yellow or white flower (if white, still with a yellow centre) {don’t ask me what does herbaceous perennials mean… go ask wikipedia it’s some sort of plant that has leaves and stems that die down at the end of the growing season to the soil level…} okay!

anemone comes in shades of white, blue, pink or red but is distinguished by the blue/black center

i couldn’t get the white flower image.. so this is the best i could give…

now! why all the single flower?

note this “A single flower given is the best romantic gift. Especially on Valentines Day. Because it says you thought about me, about the fact that it was, in fact, Valentines day. But you didn’t feel that you needed an expensive bouquet to tell me how much you love me.” - sarah ryhanen of saipua

tell that to your florist.. and he/she will hate you for the rest of your life…

sunday 01.02.09

January is over, and don’t call me love no more

monday 02.02.09

prove me one thing

and that’s all I’ve ever asked

just one thing

and you’ve failed

you let me down

again and again…

tuesday 03.02.09

what if I still love you, you asked

I’d laugh, I said

looked you in the eyes and stated, you never love me in the first place

and how I wish you would, I cried silently

friday 06.02.09

I lied about don’t wanna see you again

I wish I could believe your sorry

I do

I wish wishes come true

they don’t

saturday 07.02.09

go wild, go crazy I told my heart

forget why, forget where I told my head

forgive me I told you

for there’s no second chance, it’s the last chance

it was…

so I dance solo tonight…

no! not lonely

just alone

solo…

monday 09.02.09

take me to the river, and drowned me there

watch me die

watch my dying breath

tuesday 10.02.09

I will survive

I have to survive

wednesday 11.02.09

lie to me, and shoot me in the heart

watch me die

watch me bleed to death

how much do you need a private space? i do need one, desperately!

no, no, no… not that much space… just a little space to do whatever i love to, with no interruption what-so-ever! it could be just a lazy afternoon tea or a whole night crying after a long argument and heartbreak, reflection time, snacking… people could pass me by, acting like i wasn’t there, and just don’t bother to ask what happen?

lovely!

so… last weekend, on a tiring journey to find us {me and my siblings} a new home, we visited a cluster around Pantai Indah Kapuk… well, i won’t write down the name of it {call me evil!} because i {still} wish we could afford the house… the marketing officer let us in one of the finished house {sadly, belong to someone else…} it was nice, with the famous split level thing-y… 3 bedrooms, which are perfect for us… but the thing that caught my eyes {and my heart} was this weird space next to the stairs. it was weird! and seemed useless {for most people but me} but i fell in love with it… and so the idea of having this private space popped out. that little area was perfect for my private space…

the area is about 3m long, 1m tall and about 60cm deep, with full glass on the end… have i mentioned this space is located between 2nd and 3rd level, next to the stairs, facing north.

i’ll give you the illustration…

cute, ain’t it?

okay, so this is what i imagined about how that space would look like {if it was mine…}

1. i’ll paint one of the wall yellow and add some white graphics, or i’ll just use similar wallpaper {i guess i’ll be to lazy to really paint the graphic all by myself}

2. fill it with pile of pillows, and one big mat so it’ll be comfy enough to sit all afternoon. some brown pillows and one lime green pillow as an accent

3. organize some of my favourites book, mags, novels on the other wall

4. put a vase or two, filled with beautiful flowers, i’m thinking of ranunculus or anemone, in dusty pink colour

5. put a lovely cut out board behind the books… it’s on the west side, so i imagined it’ll be very pretty when it catches afternoon light and shadow comes in various shapes, showering the flower arragements

6. put a wooden tray with nice white cups, for my cup of cafeine

7. plant a big tree with lush of leaves so birds will nest there and singing joyful songs ever morning…

the idea is sooooo lovely, i could fell me doing it this very afternoon… watching rain drops falling on leaves and beating my window, sipping my warm coffee and enjoying the smell of fresh cut flowers

and so, i’ve made my decision! i’ll not get married before my future husband has a home {just like i wanted! the hee}

what would you do when you really really need someone to talk to, to share thoughts, but you don’t?

i need to spit these words out of my mouth, my head, my heart… but i can’t

i need someone to listen to me

just listen, please don’t judge…

just listen, please don’t interrupt…

just listen, please don’t comment…

just listen, please don’t justify…

just listen, and be quiet

is it really that important to dress up nicely? i’ll go for properly dressed, though sometimes i still do some over-dressed and worst, saltum!

my style has changed, evolved and still does… i love how people around me influenced this particular style of mine. i try to look simple, but not plain. i like to see little details here and there, just in a perfect dose. something subtle, but would not lost in the crowd.

i HATE bling-y stuffs, even just a little bling, fake diamonds or payet would drive me crazy! no specific reason here, just personal taste.

i usualy pick t-shirts and jeans for an everday look {i know… booooring!!}, but i love mini skirt for going out. i have to admit, wearing minis could be very tricky. i’m so much aware of {the imperfection of} my body, i hate my thighs, my tummy, my arms, my armpits, and so on… i really really have to be in a good mood to decide that i’m going to wear minis.

so, in the mood of celebration {it’s Chinese New Year!} i decided to dress up a little nicer last weekend…

i LOVE the dress!

found it about 2 weeks ago while searching desperately for new clothes… i insisted to buy a {mini} dress, so i don’t have to buy another pair of new jeans. and it was never easy to look for a perfect dress. as again, it’s all me… {no, this one makes my thighs look gigantic; no, i have to hide these arm!; and so on} while walking around, wandering, i spotted this okay red dress {i mean RED, really red} and said to my sister; “if only they had other colors” and they do… the other colors are… ORANGE {almost terracotta}, BROWN {kinda reddis-brown, and a little too bright}, BLUE {almost navy blue, but brighter} and TURQOUIS {this was the worst, ever!}. I lost my hope, none of the colors suited me well, then suddenly, they gave me this one color, CREAM.

Yippyyyy!!!

this is what i reffer as simple details… things that is just enough…

HA! and i’m done…

okay! this post is just such a time-waster… so, for you all the i-have-nothing-better-to-do-today… this is just puurrrfect!

don’t we all love to touch up our pictures? just to make them look a little bit better {or waaay better} or us look great in taking pictures… well, i do! so while trying so hard to do something useful for myself yesterday, i found a cute {super cute!} website called picnik. the site itself, i have to admit, boost up the narsistic side of me {well for tirta, tegal, markus… i just have a bad bad feeling that you guys gonna like it as much as i do}

picnik provides us with some photo retouching effects, just like what photoshop does, and some extra effects like lomo-ish, 60’s and infra red film. interesting right? okay… to all of you who’s familiar with photoshop, this may sounds like “do’oh?!?”, but the cute thing is, you can save the picture and upload it right to your facebook or flicker account. it’s online, and you don’t have to be a photoshop expert to have fun here! just give it a try okay?

ow, you don’t have to register, just start upload your photos and have fun, and save it back to your computer or send it right to your account…

i tried it yesterday, and these are some of the results… {no extra photoshop thing-y here}

enjoy!

i wish i had a lomo camera

celebrity wannabe

let’s begin!

keep my fingers crossed and my hopes high

okay… to be honest, this is my first {organized} resolution ever! i never thought to do it so seriously before… and that’s the reason {i believe} why my past resolutions never came up the way i imagined them.

put it in a simple way… we all just want to be a better person. but how much better? better in what? and… how? i think this the way to start to be a better person myself.

i need to change lots of things {i mean really really need and really really lots} but this is {just} the begining… everything has to begin somewhere right? i need to love ME more, need to open my world bigger and bigger, need to stop {or lessen} complaining and listen more, and maybe… need to love my family better, need to find ways to communicate with them… but that’ll be too complicated to be done in just 356 days… won’t them? i narrowed things down to these final 4 resolutions of 2009… now, it seems more do-able and boosts up the optimist mood inside me ^^

well, here they are, the final 4 :

1. Think! Think! Think! Before Talk!

this IS the worst habit of mine! the worst! i hate it, but i keep doing it again and again… sometimes it could be fun and people think i’m staright forward {i am…} but most of the time… i just look plain stupid. because i tend to spit out words before my brain starts to process the conversation, i also sound like a smartass biyatch. not good! so… i’ll take my time, keep my comments and process my line before i say it out loud…

2. Finding My Mr. Right

okay… i hate to put this one in! but i have to admit, the last 15 months i’ve been thinking a lot about partnership. i need one. that one that’ll last forever… because i need to share things, thoughts, fears, joys, hopes and tears. i guess it’s just my time… so… i’ll be more serious and selective toward guys since i’ve set my goal!

ps: and you! yeah you! please feel free to help me ^^

3. Loose 15 More Kilos

too ambitious… way too ambitious! but hell! i’ve never been proud of my body… never. and the way i look right now, failed to make me proud too. but the real goal of this resolution is finding a way to fall in love with me {my body} no matter how i look {how much i weight}. to embrace every little imperfections in me. hopefully!

4. Save More Money!

yeah baby! save money… i’ve failed to do this since my first salary ever! which is kinda embarassing… i’m 24, talking about having my own life, away from my parents, yet i’m still a parasite in their financial plans. crap! i really need to be free and settle, and able to control my greed for fashion items… this is hard! 5 days after new year, i’ve been sticking my eyes to the cutest ankle boots ever in Zara… owh well… slow down {but sure! keep focus}

nah… i think that’s all for 2009! and to be honest again… creating this resolution is fun! i recommend you all to make one… it’s fun and it lets you know yourselves better.

what’s yours? care to share?

I LOVE ONLINE SHOPPING!

yup! I do! Anyone?

I started this addiction (yes, indeed… i’m addicted to it lately) a year ago. A friend of mine opened his online shop, and i thought i would just help him out. Ordered a thing and that would be just it. Because I had no expectation… at all. But… when my stuff came, i was happy with the quality, really happy! It fits (still fits) and perfect!

Since then, i regularly check his web for new items. And… i open myself more to other online shops out there. I shop for clothes, shoes, jewels and perfumes.

I’m in love… with how things work in online shopping. I still have the joy (pleasure) of shopping, go to the mall, trying each and every clothes or just get involved with the euphoria of spending dime.

But, online shopping gives me the joy of being selfish shopper!

1. I could browse through the shop in the middle of many sleepless night.
2. I could just click the picture and save it to my computer (and pray and wish while waiting for the next pay day…).
3. I could spend 3 days (or more!) to decide what color i’m going to buy without having the grumpy store lady staring at me and cursing.
4. I could just put items in my shopping cart without actually going to buy any (just need the pleasure of having new stuffs).
5. I could shop while working, or just bored with my job.
6. no more pain heels, no more time wasted waiting in line for discount (i still go crazy every time there’s discount…).
7. I shop anytime, anywhere!

Does anyone out there share the same feeling about online shopping?

These are some of the few online shop i visit regularly… why don’t you check them out as well? mataketiga, noriko emmy, petite cupcakes, egals, cici story.

I still have the doubt when it comes to the idea of shopping from Korea, Thailand, Hong Kong… I have a bad feeling of their stuffs. I don’t know… just my gut telling me it won’t fit (or it fit, but in an ugly way), too small, low quality items… and so on. Should i just go try and shop? Anyone want to help me change my mind?